Alright, folks. I’ve got a confession to make.

Remember the night of that terrible explosion in West, TX? Some of probably felt it. I was in North Dallas when it happened so I felt nothing. I was just left confused by a series of tweets from my friends in Waxahachie. “Was that Earthquake?” “Did we just have an Earthquake?” “That was some crazy thunder.” Stuff like that.

The explosion devastated a lot of lives. It caused a lot of damage. That night, as I got ready for bed, I had made up my mind that I needed to do something. I call myself a Christian. I am a follower of Jesus Christ and wish to represent him well on Earth. Paul says that we are Christ’s ambassadors. The world is to see how great/caring/loving/selfless Jesus is through us.

So I went to bed that night planning on waking up early the next morning, calling churches in West and asking if they needed volunteers. I was willing to do anything. I’d hand out food, organize donated clothes, help people salvage possessions from destroyed homes…anything.

And you know what happened the next day? Nothing. I didn’t do it. I didn’t do anything. I didn’t even give blood. I just went through my normal day.

That is really embarrassing. And it happens all the time. I talk myself out of doing something for the sake of Jesus and his gospel all the time. You know why I didn’t go? Because It would have cost gas money. It would have taken up my whole day. I would have been uncomfortable.

I think a lot of Christians do this. We talk ourselves down from doing something that others would deem “crazy” or “foolish” for God. Remember the last night of youth camp when our heads were swimming with what we could do when we got home? We were excited. We were motivated. We were in love with Jesus.

“I could ________ for Jesus.”

“I could give up __________.”

“I could go ___________.”

“I could give ___________.”

We’re really good at talking ourselves out of it.

But look at how Jesus talks in the gospels. He encourages the “crazy” and “foolish” things. He told a rich man to sell all of his possessions and follow him (Matthew 19:21). He tells us to lose our lives (Matthew 16:25).

I should have gone to West. I should have at least done SOMETHING. I could have just given blood. But I talked myself out of it. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to guilt anyone about not doing anything for West. Maybe you did do something. If you did, awesome!

Another thing that happens when someone talks like this is that people accuse them of preaching a Works Based salvation. Stop it. THAT’S NOT WHAT I’M SAYING! Going to West would not have saved me. Giving sway all of my stuff and moving to Africa won’t save me. Putting all of my love and trust (“believing”) in Jesus Christ is what saves me. But all of that love and trust that I put in Jesus should do something to me. Just think about who Jesus is! Think about what He did! Think about how loving and trustworthy He is!

I should love and trust Jesus enough to do ANYTHING for Him. I should be motivated by love. I should feel safe, secure, and free because of that trust. He’s got me! “But what if–” NO! Whatever happens I know that He’s got me. I trust Him! I should love and trust Him enough to put myself in uncomfortable or foolish situations for the sake of His gospel.

What have you talked yourself out of lately? What were you supposed to do? What were you supposed to give? Where were you supposed to go? Wo were you supposed to pray for?

It’s never to late.

I started working out. This was a stupid decision and I don’t recommend it to anyone. But, alas, it is a necessary evil. If you were to go through my twitter feed and count the number of times I mention eating a whole pizza by myself you would understand why I need to exercise. I get winded if I take my laundry out of the dryer too fast. That’s not a good sign.

A couple friends of mine started to do the Insanity Work Out and for some reason I decided to join in. My body is so sore. This is supposed to happen, right? I’m supposed to be in this much pain, right? I’m supposed to cry every time I try to sit down on the toilet because my leg muscles are about to explode, RIGHT?!

I don’t think it’s safe for me to be doing Insanity. My body hurts so much. I don’t want to move at all today. If the building I am in were to catch on fire, I don’t think I’d have it in me to run out.

Also, I don’t plan on going “all out” with this exercising. They say you’re supposed to have 6 pack abs by the end of a month or something ridiculous like that. I’m not looking for that. I don’t want a 6 pack. That’s just way too much responsibility. Getting a 6 pack is like getting a puppy. You have to feed it right. You have to take it on walks. You have to…uh…buy it chew toys? I don’t know. Look, I just don’t want to be RIPPED. That’s not a term I want people to use to describe me. RIPPED. My personality doesn’t fit in with RIPPED.

“Have you seen that comedian Taylor Johnson? He’s so funny and so RIPPED!”

Stupid.

NOTE: I wrote this post yesterday but forgot to post it. Today is Friday. My friends and I ditched on our Insanity work out last night. Instead we went to Applebee’s and ate way too much. I’m ashamed of myself.

ANOTHER NOTE: I still don’t know how to spell the word “necessary.” I have to look it up every time I want to use it. Why is that word so hard for me? Necessary. The spelling makes no sense. I hate that word. I try to avoid using it whenever I can but some times it’s just….dang it…some times the word is necessary to describe what I need to describe.

ANOTHER ANOTHER NOTE: Sup?

Dangerous Wonder!

I just finished reading a book. That’s probably one of the most satisfying feelings in the world. At least it is for me. Probably because there was a long period in my life where I never did it. I would always start a book. I got really good at it. I could start a book like the best of them. Then half way through I’d get bored and buy 5 new books. I had an addiction. But now I’ve gotten in the habit of actually reading whole books all the way through!

This last book that I just finished a few days ago was fantastic. DANGEROUS WONDER by Mike Yaconelli. Funny last name, great writer. It’s not a long book. Nor is it a scholarly look at some deep theological whatnot. It’s just about looking at God with the same wonder as a child. Simple. Beautiful. You should definitely pick it up. I have to thank Garland Owensby for showing me this guy. I was first introduced to Yaconelli when I noticed Owensby quoted him in a ton of his sermons. I asked him about it and he recommend this book. I am so glad he did.

Every time I picked up the book I had to open a Word Document to take notes. There was so much goodness that I needed to write down. I’d like to share some with you.

-”I’m ready for a Christianity that ruins my life.”

-”The greatest enemy of Christianity may be people who say they believe in Jesus but who are no longer astonished and amazed.”

-”Remember when you said yes to Jesus that first time? You didn’t know all the rules, but you knew Jesus. Sadly, the church immediately stepped in and told us we needed to know more than Jesus; we needed to know the rules of the Christian faith, otherwise we might end up in confusion and spiritual anarchy. The church is always worried we might make a mistake.

Mistakes are the guaranteed consequence of wild abandon. Mistakes are signs of growth. That is why the Old and New Testament are full of people who made mistakes. The church should be the one place in our culture where mistakes are not only expected but welcomed.”

-”Passion is always risky. The Bible gives example after example of people who fell in love with Jesus and left their jobs, their families, their security. Once people met Jesus, their passion became hazardous to their health. People were estranged from the church and rejected by their parents; they became unemployed suddenly, ended up in jail, lost their lives, became personae non grate, and were accused of being drunkards. Passion is not something to be treated lightly. The passionate life is a risky life. The question is: Is the passionate life worth the risk?”

This book was a really good read for me. Now I’m just praying that I live out what I felt so motivated to do by this book.

34818_w185Dangerous Wonder by Mike Yaconelli

Prank Idea

RedVelvetCake1

Here is a great prank idea:

You give someone a cake filled with laxatives. They eat it. Science takes over and causes them to need the restroom immediately. It’s an emergency and so they are running through their house because it just can’t wait. This is when they discover that every single toilet in their house is filled with gold fish. Like, the real fish…not the cracker. Now they’re faced with a terrifying dilemma! Do they risk holding it long enough to scoop all of the fish out of the toilet bowl? Or do they yell “forget it” and just KILL THE FISH!??!

Think about it! Think of the panic on their face when they lift the toilet seat and see all of those innocent and unsuspecting fish. They’re just swimming in that clear clean water. Meanwhile Cake Farts is just standing there about to explode. What do they do? What would YOU do?

It’s not just a great prank. It’s a great moral puzzle…or something. It’s like SAW, I guess. I don’t know.

A week after I came up with this prank a group of people tried to pull it on me. Except without the goldfish. Just the poop cake. I caught on before eating any, though. They presented me with the cake and I needed a way to get out of there without seeming rude. There was a 5% chance I was wrong and these people legitimately wanted to bake me a cake. I texted a friend “call my phone to get me out of here.” He did. I answered. “Oh, Seth needs me. I got to go” I said as I awkwardly walked out of the house.

“Friends don’t let friends poop their pants.” That’s what I tweeted that night. Why am I telling you this? I don’t know. Have a good night.

I belong to the Assemblies of God. I feel like most (if not all) of you already knew that. Just thought I’d clarify if there was any confusion. Anyways, I attended the 7:14 Prayer & Bible Conference this week, an A/G event. It was great. At this conference was the general superintendent of the Assemblies of God, Dr. George Wood. Dr. Wood is a wonderful man and a fantastic speaker. He’s also on twitter. That’s what this is really about. It’s about his twitter.

If you’re a spiritual leader in some capacity it makes sense that you’ll use social media to share insightful spiritual thoughts, right? Right. I get it. I see those tweets all the time. You do too. Let me go find one right now….BOOM. Found one. Didn’t take more that 3 seconds. Spiritual tweet from Jacob Jester: “The vision belongs to God, it doesn’t belong to you. It’s more about We than it is about Me.” Cool. Good word.

Some times the spiritual tweets aren’t as good. Some times it feels like they’re trying too hard. Something like “God is not just a new pair of jeans!” What? I don’t know. I just made that up. It makes no sense. I wonder if I could get any retweets if I actually posted that. I’m going to try. I’ll let you know by the end of the post if I get anything.

So some times spiritual tweets can be really good and some times they can be the opposite. But then there is this one specific tweet from the general superintendent of the Assemblies of God, Dr. George Wood. It was posted at the beginning of February and it FREAKED ME OUT because it MADE NO SENSE AT ALL. Here it is:

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I took a screenshot of it immediately and sent it to several friends. “What in the world does this mean?” I knew it had to mean SOMETHING! Dr. Wood is a very smart man. I’ve had the pleasure of hearing him speak on several occasions. I love and respect the guy. So this thing about gorillas had to mean something. It had to be profound. I just wasn’t getting it. It was like some sort of word puzzle. Was it a riddle? Was it the Da Vinci Code? It had to mean something!

I sent the tweet to a friend who is a youth pastor. He showed his dad, who is also a pastor. Neither got it. I showed it to a few other people. Everyone is confused. Good. It’s not just me.

Then I find out that a few minutes after it was posted the tweet was DELETED! What?! What does that mean? Was someone trying to cover up this tweet?! WHAT DID IT MEAN?! I’m so glad I took a screenshot. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t have any evidence of the gorilla Jesus tweet.

Time passes. I find out about this prayer and Bible conference. I find out that Dr. George Wood is going to be a speaker. “This is my chance,” I thought. “I’m going to confront this man about his tweet!”

After one of the sessions of the conference I waited around in the auditorium with a few friends. They knew about my mission and were there to make sure I wasn’t going to chicken out. I really wanted to chicken out. Finally an opportunity presented itself. Dr. Wood had just finished a conversation and he was on his way out. I made my face do that thing where you can tell it’s about to say something. It caught his attention. He stopped.

“Excuse me, sir. I just wanted to ask who runs your twitter?”

He tells me that he does a lot of the posts but also has another guy named Mark who posts for him.

“A little while ago you tweeted something and I was really confused–”

I immediately regret that I am doing this. Who am I? What am I doing? Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Don’t ask the man about his insane tweet. Leave him alone! But I keep going. I even show him the screenshot of the tweet that I keep on my phone.

He tells me he has no idea what that is. Join the club. He’s never seen that before. I try to force myself to laugh a little. I want to show him I’m playfully showing him this silly accidental tweet. This isn’t hard hitting investigative journalism where I need him to answer serious questions about what he posts on the internet. I’m a dumb 23 year old. I don’t work for the New York Times.

He tells me again he has no idea what that tweet is. Then he turns to a man who with him. “Have you seen this?” A few other guys gather around to read the tweet. They’re amused. Thank God.

Again Dr. Wood brings up this Mark guy who writes some of his tweets. Apparently “Mark” usually goes through Dr. Wood’s writings and selects a thought that seems tweetable. Somebody jokingly asks “you ever write anything about a gorilla?” Dr. Wood considers the question. “Yes,” he says “I have written about a gorilla. But it had nothing to do with that. I don’t know what that is.”

I thank him for his time and walk away. I felt as if a weight was lifted. The mystery was over. It was a mistake that had nothing to do with Dr. Wood. It wasn’t one of his thoughts. Good to know.

But seriously! Who DID write that and what were they thinking?!! Was it this Mark guy? Did the illuminati hack his account to spread their message?!

Should we not let Jesus sit where He wants? Is that the message? And why is there an extra i in Him? Typo or hidden message? Someone ask that guy who made that Illuminati Super Bowl video to investigate.

What’s the moral? I don’t know. Leave George Wood alone? I feel like that’s what I learned. Seriously, I felt like such an idiot showing him that tweet. Dr. Wood, if you’re reading this…please buy my stand-up album off iTunes. Oh, and I’m sorry I bothered you. That too.

That’s the end of my story. No one retweeted my “God is not just a new pair of jeans” tweet. I did get one response that said “you can say that again” but I think they were just making fun of me.

I’m kind of a youth pastor now. On Saturday I was tasked with cleaning out an old youth storage closet at the church (which will soon be my office). I found some long forgotten gold in that storage closet. Carman VHS carman The first concert I ever went to was a Carman concert. Zoe Girl opened up for him. I remember it well. I’m pretty sure I even cried at one point. I was young. My second concert was a Bill Gaither reunion thing. A lot of old people. My mom enjoyed it. Oh, lord. My first two concerts were with my mom. I just realized that. That’s embarrassing. Donut Man VHS Donut Man I think I watched Donut Man when I was kid. I can’t remember. Maybe once or twice I saw a VHS. I just looked at the back cover of this one and it say “Live Action Fun For Eternity!” Apparently you’ll enjoy this tape all the way to heaven? That’s pretty cool. and a Left Behind video game. Left Behind You might be wondering what exactly you would do in a Left Behind video game. Let me tell you some of the highlights presented on the back cover. “Combat the anitchrist’s forces on two battle front – physical & spiritual warfare: Use the power o prayer and worship to resist spiritual influences and defend against their physical attacks using modern military weapons.” In other games you would be a wizard and cast spells to defeat goblins or ghosts. In this game you’re a Christian who can cast intercessory prayers at the antichrist. I wonder what youth pastors will find in old forgotten storage closets 20 years from now and laugh at. Nothing is cool forever. And some things were never cool to begin with. Beware Christian entertainment. Some times they’re just trying to make money like the rest of the entertainment world. The more I look at this Left Behind video game the more upset I get. This is why people don’t like us (Christians) and think we’re weird and dumb. We need to offer better entertainment to the poor overly sheltered Christian youth out there. Let’s get on that.

John Piper is a great man! He has a scholar’s mind and a pastor’s heart. His passion for the gospel is so evident in his speaking and writings. Don’t Waste Your Life is no exception.

I could not be a more perfect example of Piper’s target audience for this book. I just graduated from college a month ago and have no idea what I’m going to do now. Most days I sit around my apartment watching movies and eating entire pizzas by myself. I am wasting this part of my life.

Don’t Waste Your Life is very similar to recent works like David Platt’s Radical or Francis Chan’s Crazy Love. Both are great. Piper stands out, though, in that he writes with the authority of a father figure. If you’re familiar with his other writing you will find this one to be unique in its writing style. He knows he is speaking to a younger audience and so he adapts his scholarly structure for the reader. Does that mean he’s dumbing it down? Absolutely not.

The basic message is this: we exist to make much of God. Everything we do should be for the purpose of making much of God. We should make much of God even when it goes against our pride and selfishness, even when it hurts. We should help others see how great God is and lead them to make much of Him with their own lives. God is incredible. John Piper has always done a great job of reminding me of that. The passion he stirs in me reminds me of that “youth camp passion.” That passion to strip my life of everything that did not get myself and others closer to God. That passion that I could talk myself out of a few weeks after camp was done. “Let’s be reasonable. That was crazy talk. Just go back to normal.” It’s good to have a father figure encouraging behavior that seems so stupid to the world and yet seems so familiar to Christ.