My Graphic Design Process is Terrible

Here is my process for graphic design

1. Have an idea
2. Recreate what’s in my brain in Photoshop
3. Do a bad job
4. Get frustrated
5. Take a nap
6. Try again
7. Succeed but realize it was a dumb idea and it looks bad
8. Give up
9. Forget that I’m supposed to be making something
10. Go on urbanoutfitters.com and look at vinyl album artwork
11. Find something I can rip off
12. Try
13. Do a bad job
14. QUESTION EVERY LIFE CHOICE YOU'VE EVER MADE
15. nap
16. Try to think of cool new ways I can trick talented friends into doing it for me for free
17. Realize that’s a bad idea
18. Distract myself with Twitter
19. Try one more time with a different idea
20. Accidentally make something that looks pretty cool
21. Freak out with excitement
22. Polish it up and make it look nice
23. Second guess myself
24. Decide it’s good enough

This is always the process and it’s exhausting.

I recently wen through all these steps as I tried to create some sort of graphic for my 2018 stand-up tour, The Black Hole Comedy Tour.

My original idea was doing something where I scribble a poorly drawn “black hole” over my face. This would really fit the theme of the show because it’s about the type of topics we’re afraid to talk about because they feel like they’ll be black holes that’ll suck everything into it and ruin our friendships.

I tested out this design and didn’t like it at all.

Then it was time for a nap.

I screwed around some more and made this

I’m not good at this. I hate this.

Then I made this weird thing.

Meh. TIME FOR A NAP AND TO QUESTION EVERYTHING.

But when I came back I made this and thought it was…..ok, I guess.

Then I did my classic move of looking at album artwork for something I could steal and that’s when I found the design for the Bojack Horseman soundtrack and I really loved it.

I loved that involved space (black holes are in space). I loved that was so simple so it’ll be easier for someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing to recreate it.

I tried using my silhouette and just doing the exact same as Bojack but it wasn’t working. I really liked the little ink droplet from the earlier thing so I just used that instead and then I couldn’t stop screaming out of excitement because it actually looked ok.

Praise God.

It is finished. I don’t have to worry about designing anything else for a while. This will get me through the year.

Also, and this is only kinda related, but you should check out Austin Kleon's book Steal Like an Artist.

New Free Video Series | How to Lead a Culture of Confession

My biggest passion in my comedy and preaching is confession. We need to be open and honest about what’s going on in our lives.

Paul says in Galatians that we need to bear each other’s burdens but how can we bear someone’s burden if we don’t know what it is?

I’ve created a free video series to train church leaders on how to be the type of leader that people will feel comfortable opening up to.

Watch the series

This is for pastors, small group leaders, volunteers, or church members who just want to be a good friend to the people in their lives.

HOW TO LEAD A CULTURE OF CONFESSION is a free 4 day video series.

Sign up with your email address and for the next 4 days you’ll receive a new video in your inbox every morning. They’re short, simple, but challenging.

Start today and walk through the steps that will let your church know that you’re a leader they can be honest with.

SIGN UP NOW TO WATCH “HOW TO LEAD A CULTURE OF CONFESSION”

It’s easy. It’s free. It can make a huge impact.

Watch it on your own while sitting on the toilet (they’re short videos) or go through the series with your ministry team. You’ll end up having some incredible discussions.

How Do We Call Out What's Bad?

John Darnielle, frontman and songwriter of The Mountain Goats, said one of my new favorite quotes on the latest episode of the podcast I ONLY LISTEN TO THE MOUNTAIN GOATS.

He was talking about how his favorite protest songs are upbeat and fun. They’re about serious issues but they’re also songs you can dance to. And then he said this:

“It’s great to call out what’s bad but if we can do it in a way that everyone still has a good time along the way, we’re more likely to get more people involved.”

This is my entire motivation behind how and why I do stand-up. I want to talk about confession. I want to call out the types of issues we get nervous talking about but I think there’s a way of getting there that can involve a lot of silliness and laughs.

Yes, the actually message is serious but laughter can make it easier to swallow. I can’t believe I’m about to reference this but, “A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down.”

Find out more about how I partner with churches for the most effective way to use comedy as an outreach.

Being an Anchor | a lesson from FAILING FAITH

What am I supposed to do for someone I care about when they’re suffering?

How do I help a friend after a tragedy?

I know they’re hurting but I don’t know what to do for them.

How do I make them better?

We put a lot of pressure on ourselves when someone we love reaches out to us in a vulnerable moment. There’s pain or loss in their lives and they need someone to be there for them and you desperately want to fill that role but you have no idea how.

We feel like we need to be the hero. We need to snap them out of it. There’s a perfect piece of advice around here somewhere, and I need to be the one to deliver it before it’s too late.

I just finished Wade Bearden’s new book Failing Faith. It’s incredible and I think it should become essential reading for Christians, especially because of the insight into this very topic.

Throughout the book Wade walks us through what it was like watching his father’s battle with cancer. It’s beautifully written and so incredibly honest about such a heartbreaking time in his life.

There are tears. There’s anger. There’s loss. There’s doubt.

He offers a window into what’s it like in those moments for those of us on the outside who feel at a loss for how to help. In one chapter he describes how his wife, Priscilla, was there to support him.

Once, after I heard some especially bad news about my father, Priscilla leaned her head against my shoulder and quietly whispered that she loved me. Her statement felt like warm honey to my soul. This wasn’t the first or last time she did it either. Sure, sometimes she’d offer advice, but most of the time she just walked alongside me. She became a symbol to the new life that I longed for. The fresh experience of all-surrounding joy.

This is a pattern you start to notice throughout the book. There were moments that were the most meaningful during this time, and very few of them revolved around advic. There’s nothing in here about a friend or family member saying just the right thing at the right time and changing everything.

Wade states the lesson plainly at one point:

When someone is in pain—when they’ve experienced a miscarriage, lost a loved one, or saw their future fall apart— presence is always better than philosophy. Write that down and make sure to look at it often. When someone is in pain, don’t explain to them how God is in control. Just be the anchor they need to make it through the hurricane.

This should be a relief to us, the friends and family. We don't have to shy away from hospital visits. We don't have to fear what might happen if we ask how things are going. Our list of responsibilities is a lot more manageable. We don’t have to find the perfect words. They probably don’t exist. We’re not there to fix anyone. We just have to be there. They might go through some dark and devastating times, and our job is the anchor.

I’m here.

I’m right here.

I’m still here.

We can do that. We can handle that.

Read Failing Faith for yourself. I'm telling you, it's an amazing book. I’m not just saying that because Wade is a close personal friend and I’m even thanked in the acknowledgements at the end of the book. It’s no big deal. Why even bring it up?

GET FAILING FAITH ON AMAZON

HOT TAKE: Thanksgiving is Dumb

I love Christmas so much I hate Thanksgiving.

This Thanksgiving season I am thankful for Christmas.

— Taylor Johnson (@taylordson) November 6, 2012

Thanksgiving is just a speed bump you have to endure on your way to Christmas.

Thanksgiving is a bully standing between me and my ability to celebrate Christmas in public without getting judged.

Christmas is the only holiday I actually celebrate. I don’t even go to church on Easter. I always find a church that has a Saturday night service so I can avoid the crowds. GO AHEAD AND JUDGE ME! I AIN'T SCARED!

The Grinch wouldn't even waste his time with Thanksgiving.

— Taylor Johnson (@taylordson) November 27, 2015

Everything Thanksgiving does Christmas does better.

Time with your family? Christmas wins. Get out of here, Thanksgiving. Half of your holiday is focused on trying to get Black Friday deals so you can have an even better Christmas.

A ton of food? Christmas does that too. And better. Yeah, I said it. Christmas gives you a lot of food, but Thanksgiving gives you too much food. You eat this food all day until you're sick and then you're forced to continue eating that food for the next week. No one likes leftovers. No one is excited about leftovers. People tolerate them. Thanksgiving is famous for making you eat old food.

There are no popular Thanksgiving movies.

There’s no Thanksgiving music.

May all your Thanksgiving wishes come true.
Huh?
What's that? That's not a thing?
Oh yeah. I forgot this holiday sucks.

— Taylor Johnson (@taylordson) November 27, 2015

It's a Thanksgiving miracle!
Oh yeah.
Not a thing either.
Stupid holiday.

— Taylor Johnson (@taylordson) November 27, 2015

On Thanksgiving the president pardons a turkey as a fun joke where the leader of our country does a whole ceremony where he treats a dumb bird like a criminal that he’s letting off the hook. Super cool. Do we do any weird stuff like that on Christmas? No. We just talk about Jesus Christ, WHO PARDONS ALL THE SINFUL TURKEYS BY DYING ON THE CROSS. I know that's Easter related but we wouldn't have Easter without Christmas. Think about it.

I’m sure some of you aren’t really into all this Thanksgiving hate. You think I’m being a real Scrooge and you want me to be visited by the ghosts of Thanksgiving Past, Present, and Future. Well too bad. That's a Christmas thing.

Alright. That's enough. I don't want to shame you for your Thanksgiving love. It's an excuse to spend time with your family. So do it. Enjoy it. Find out something about your parents or grandparents that you never knew before. Start a tradition. Laugh and eat until you fall asleep.

Happy Thanksgiving.

INTERVIEW: Comedy, Confession, and School Assemblies

I’m on a podcast.

I travel with North Texas Youth Alive as one of their speaker for school assemblies. A while ago I wrote about one of the most difficult assemblies I've had to do.

This week I was interviewed by Kyle Embry, the director for the ministry, on their Youth Alive podcast. It’s designed to be another resource for the churches they’re serving.

I talk about how I write my segments for the assemblies, confession, and how to be there for students who are opening up about what they’re going through.

I haven’t listened back to this thing yet. I might sound like a total idiot. Who knows!

What Questlove Taught Me: "Is This Allowed?"

There’s an episode of the A Piece of Work podcast all about emojis and whether they should be considered art or not. In one segment the host is interviewing Questlove, drummer for  The Roots and guy in the picture above this paragraph). He brings up this idea I absolutely love. He’s talking about music and says:

"…any album that’s ever come out and I had to ask “is this allowed?” Then it’s pretty much high art."

Now, I don’t know anything about art and I’d feel like a complete idiot if I started calling anything at all HIGH ART but I love the concept.

Think of ANYTHING groundbreaking, unique, revolutionary, or influential in our culture. There was a moment with all of them when people first encountered it and had to ask "are they allowed to do this?"

We get to so used to how things are already being done. How everything should look, sound, and feel.

Subconsciously trends turn into rules and we feel like we’re not allowed to break them.

I want to be more aware of this. When I’m brainstorming, when I’m working on something new, if I ever have an idea that makes me nervous and causes me to ask “is that allowed” I know I’m heading in the right direction.

Throwing Away Everything & Starting Over

For the last year and a half I’ve been touring with a stand-up show called Tell a Good Story. It’s a set show with its own jokes and a message about the power of telling your story.

BUT NOW IS THE TIME TO DESTROY IT ALL!!!

In January I’m throwing away all of Tell a Good Story and starting a new tour. It’ll have all new material. It’ll have a new theme and message. I’ve been slowly working out the material little by little over the last few months. I’ve snuck new jokes into shows since the summer. But there’s still a lot of work to do.

Writing new material is really scary for me. I have this fear that I’m going to forget how to be funny. I made this video last year about how frustrating it is for me to write new jokes.

I think one of the videos I’m most proud of is this one where I tell the story of the first time I ever got paid to do stand-up. The music I used in the video is all over the place and kinda distracting but I think it’s a really funny story. At the beginning I talk abut the process on becoming a better comedian. You basically have to fail a lot and embarrass yourself in public over and over until you’re good. Hooray!

I've only got a few more performances of Tell a Good Story this year. Then it's on to the new stuff. I'm really excited.

If you're interested in bringing my new show to your church next year, check out THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO USE COMEDY AS AN OUTREACH.

A PIECE OF WORK: an honest podcast about art

Last week while desperately hunting for a new podcast I found this 10 episode mini series called A PIECE OF WORK. The podcast’s website describes it as “everything you want to know about modern art but were afraid to ask.”

It’s hosted by Abbi Jacobson, co-creator of Comedy Central’s Broad City, and each episode she learns about a different style of modern art. Have you ever been to a museum and seen paintings that are just random paint splatters or a simple triangle painted on a wall and thought “Why?! What is this supposed to be?!” This podcast answers that question in the most entertaining way.

The thing I love about the show is how honest it is. The host often brings her friends (including Hannibal Burress, Tavi Gevinson, Questlove, RuPaul) to the museum of modern art and introduces art pieces to get their opinion. I love this part because the guests don’t feel like they have to lie, pretend, or sound smart. They’re just honest. If they think it's dumb, they’ll say. If they like it but they’re not sure why, they’ll say it. No consideration given to how "uneducated" they may sound.

Museums can feel like such daunting places because you might feel like you’re not allowed to be yourself. You feel this pressure to go from art piece to art piece, stare in silence, make a face like you’re REALLY getting something deep from it, then nod your head and move on. Like an intellectual or a fancy boy.

Whenever a museum curator is interviewed for A PIECE OF WORK they never shy away from the fact that they were well aware of what most people think of modern art. They know we often think it's total crap. They're not afraid to quote the biggest criticism all modern art receives: “What is this junk?! I could have made that.” But what's cool is they're willing to start there because they're confident in their ability to get us to a place where we understand and appreciate the art.

I think the honesty makes this podcast so accessible. The show doesn’t shame you for not “getting it.” It’s ok with you admitting you don’t like modern art. I think that approach made me lean in. That made me want to be more open to learn, and be a part of this conversation.

Honesty has that effect.

Listen to all 10 episodes: https://t.co/aguRGFGjS7

Inviting People to Church

Christians have a lot of weird ideas for how to get people in to their church. I think I’ve come up with a great test to help figure out if your method of inviting people is weird or not. 

I think a really easy way to invite someone would be to say to friends you’re hanging out with “Hey, you want to come to this free comedy show?”

That doesn’t seem too strange at all.

Churches should think about hosting comedy shows. HINT HINT HINT.

Here’s the most effective way to use comedy as an outreach.